I looked at my calendar today to confirm that it is indeed February 18, 2014. I did this because I was almost convinced that I had inadvertently travelled back to the 1950’s. Why would I think that, you ask? Well, you’re going to find out!
Being single at the age of 34 isn’t really the same life plan as most, if not all, of my friends. This has become glaringly obvious at times that I want to get out of the house during the week and do something fun. Nothing too crazy, maybe dinner and a drink? However, trying to wrangle someone out of their cozy love nests that they have is somewhat impossible. I’m not blaming them at all. Actually, I would be doing the same thing if I had a +1 at home to talk to/watch tv with/wear pajamas with. It’s the worst winter ever and no one wants to go out. I get it. I have been relegated to staring at my 4 walls all winter and I’m getting serious cabin fever. At this point, I think I’m kind of on par with Jack Torrance (minus the fabulous hotel, of course).
Over the past few weeks, I’ve started doing things I don’t normally do, or have neglected over time. Some examples: performing stand-up at an open mic (fun), journaling, attempting a 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzle, eating a variety of international cheeses (most fun), and going out alone (!!!!!!!!)
Some of you may have just choked on a piece of interesting international cheese when reading that last part.
That’s right, I go out alone. I have gone to dinner alone, sat in a coffee shop alone, and even gone to a bar alone. I never thought this to be very scandalous, but apparently some people do. I’ve caught all kinds of grief from my mother about it. She told me that I NEED TO BE CAREFUL and that it’s DANGEROUS out there. Note: in all fairness to her, she is my mother and I kind of get why she’s saying it. However, I have also heard these same comments from people my age, which has kind of baffled.
I have always been independent and done what I wanted to do. As much as I love my friends, I also love doing things by myself. I like to think I have a good head on my shoulders and can make practical and logical decisions*. So, when someone asks me why I go out by myself, I can’t understand this question. My response is simple: I do it because I can. I’m not sure what tawdry places people may think I’m frequenting, but I can assure you, they’re not that terrible.** Apparently, there is still the impression that a woman alone is weak, naive, and completely incapable of doing anything for herself. I can guarantee that a man is never questioned of this. Of course not; it’s an accepted behavior. But……a woman??? You’re crazy. We need men to protect us! It’s as if we will suddenly forget every lesson learned about knowing our environment and being safe. It’s just not the case. I am a social creature by nature and I love meeting new people. So……I go out. Alone.
I’m going to let everyone in on a little secret: crime has always existed.
We are living in a fear based society where everything we see on the news is a report of something horrific. If you chose to listen to all of these news stories, then I understand why people are questioning me even leaving my house. The thing is, we’re just more aware of it now, thanks to social media spreading these stories like wildfire. You’re not necessarily safer if you’re with a man, or a group of friends. Awful things happen; it’s just part of life. You shouldn’t let these things stop you from living.
In just the past few weeks, I’ve met some really great people who I probably would never have met, had I been with others. It’s gotten me out of the house and interacting with society (that’s a good thing!). I’m certainly not going to meet people sitting in my apartment every day.
So, while I do appreciate the concern, I’m going to be just fine, I promise. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must get back to work. The other secretaries are starting to wonder what I’m doing.
*Some decisions I make are not practical and logical. Eating half a block of cheese in one sitting is not practical, nor logical.
**Some places I have gone to have been a little terrible.